Every athlete fears the slump; the part of their career where nothing exciting happens. Yes they show up for the games but they’ve lost their interest. How they break out of their slump… they break the mold, they try a new workout and get a new mindset. Now, let’s take this to the bedroom. Are you in a mid season slump? Are you feeling bored and tired of your married sex life? Here are 5 ideas to try to keep things exciting and orgasmic with your spouse.
Oral sex is a must.
No exceptions to this. You have to make it part of your sex game plan. If you’ve never tried it, then don’t say you don’t like it. If you’ve tried it twice or three times and still don’t like it, then give it another shot. This time, approach it as a way to serve and please your spouse and get you both in the mood quickly. And husbands, did you know that only 10% of females can orgasm vaginally?
Strengthen your senses.
Certain smells and sounds can have a Pavlovian affect on your libido. Think about what puts you in the mood, and then designate an enhancer that will signal to your brain and body that it’s time to get naughty. For example, before sex, put on a sultry jazz station on Pandora, light a scented candle, or spray something nice on you.
Add sex toys in the mix.
Some couples don’t need toys or are afraid and that’s ok, but for you women who are having a difficult time getting in the mood, a personal vibrator can be a great help to stimulate your clitoris. Remember this doesn’t say to your spouse, “You can’t make me orgasm.” Toys can be a creative way to enhance your sex life.
Blindfold your spouse.
This increases their sensory awareness. Your spouse doesn’t know where you are or what you’re going to do next. This creates anticipation for better sex — the tease. Tease them mercilessly with sensory objects, such as a feather or your tongue. Start off softly, as this excites the nerve endings and makes them far more sensitive.
Try a new position.
The missionary position is the trusty standby, but if we want to change things up and get out of the slump, it’s time to get freaky! Four positions that most couples like: doggy style, girl on top, spooning and face-off. Get creative and figure out how you guys can make a perfect fit (if you know what I mean). Be sure to try 2 or 3 different positions during sex to make it last longer.
Try something new this week and don’t chicken out!
Written by Meygan Caston
Meygan Caston is the co-founder of Marriage365 and lives in sunny Southern California with her husband Casey, their two children and dog Hobie. She loves her family, the beach, writing, spa days and helping couples connect in their marriage. Her life long dream is to live with the Amish for a month, walk the Camino and have lunch with Brené Brown.